Well, actually, Byron Tau has been hanging around GOPolitico for a while, but a week ago he became the boss man on their ’44’ section – you know, the bit that’s devoted to telling us the President hates Israel and the First Lady is a food fascist.
Whatever happened our beloved Julie Mason? Did she get bored with her dearest hobby at GOPolitico – counting black faces in the White House?
Any way, just to let you know, Byron has started fantastically well. Here’s most of what he expertly picked out as the big news the past week:
Not since Woodward and Bernstein has a journalist broken a story so monumental: Joe Manchin doesn’t support the President? Who knew?! Spectacular start Byron! Pulitzer stuff!
So, Byron listened to the President’s speech at Fort Bragg about the ending of the Iraq war and was moved. Moved to be stunned by the President’s failure to give a ‘love you lots’ shout-out to the man who started the war, thereby giving PBO the very lucky opportunity to end it. Breathtaking ingratitude. Keep it up Byron, you’re doing great.
Next, Byron watches the VP’s interview with Rachel Maddow and is just gobsmacked when the VP completely fails to describe the ending of a pointless war as a ‘failure’. Well spotted Byron. VPs have been impeached for less. Well, no, they haven’t, but you get the point.
Woot, only three days in to his new ’44’ job and Byron’s really hotting up! He spots an op-ed by that most principled of Blue Dogs, Dennis Cardoza, on The Hill site and almost faints with delirium as he links it for us! Byron Tau, the Walter Kronkite of our generation!
After OFA promised to send a thank you email to your GOP-supporting relatives if they annoyed you enough to donate to Obama/Biden 2012, Byron was clearly pissed after his inbox was stuffed with emails …. after his Dem-supporting aunties, uncles, grandmothers, grandfathers, nieces and nephews passed on his address.
Byron didn’t have much to say about the Obama family portrait, apart from quoting a GOPolitico colleague’s revelation that Sasha’s dress cost $73.99. That much?!? Jeez, a bit uppity!
Another scoop by Byron – who knew Orrin Hatch still existed?
We’re on a roll now! Byron shares with us Alex Burns’ story about the President shamefacedly letting the American people know the Iraq war is over. Thanks so much Byron, this outrage needed to be exposed. A commendable unveiling of an ugly truth.
More brilliance. Byron’s take on that AP-GfK poll that had a gazillion different talking points, but this is the one he liked. Quite understandable too. Thanks Byron, your poll-dissecting abilities are special.
Superb Byron! It never hurts to point out the President’s Godlessness! True, Amy Sullivan didn’t ‘lament’ anything, she simply pointed out how tricky it is for a President and his family to visit a ‘public’ church – from a security and ‘fuss’ point of view – and noted (although Byron must have missed this bit when he summarised) that “more often, Obama and his family have followed the lead of the Bush family, joining the congregation at Camp David …. but staying home on Sunday mornings when in Washington”.
But, never mind – great headline!
You know, I was beginning to worry for Byron’s job security – a whole week had gone by and he hadn’t written about the President and Israel at GOPolitico. Phew, at last! Now, those of you who argue that the President didn’t “defend” his policy on Israel today, that he simply re-stated it, are just a bunch of picky Obots.
I’d like to think, though, that someone here helped Byron keep his job by sending him this reminder today:
Although, we can’t be sure if he actually read it, the fella is awfully busy on Twitter:
(Note: it’s never ‘President’ or ‘Pres’, it’s ‘Obama’ – but that’s okay Byron, we understand ;-) )
And re-tweeting the Drudge Report can be very time-consuming:
But, awesome job this week Byron, you’re destined for a stellar career at GOPolitico!
Update – Byron’s very latest story:
Woot! And he even quotes Keith ‘I hate Michelle Obama so much I could cry’ Koffler in the story – you know, the guy who makes Michele Bachmann seem like Jane Fonda! Byron? You rock!